That's a question I ask my imaginary Parakeet too. Apparently so do many other people using Google's Search.
According to Google's "Hot Trends", a Google tool that lets you see what's on the public's collective mind by viewing the fastest-rising searches for different points of time, on Nov 11 "Why Won't My Parakeet Eat My Diarrhea" was one of the hottest search topics. Number 10 in fact.
Now does anyone know why my can't won't eat my diarrhea? (it's actually a suggested google search as well)